Ever feel like your head is about to explode?
People who suffer from Anxiety Attachment Disorder feel the tension and a sense of inability to deal with typical situations. Often times they will envision the worst possible outcome of a problem. This disorder will make a person overly concerned about work, family issues, or money so much that they will foresee disaster happening and make inappropriate adjustments to their lives in response to heavy symptoms of stress and anxiety disorders. If these symptoms persist for over 6 months and show no signs of ending, you need to call your doctor.
How many of you have felt this way, even for a week? A month? Four months? Life keeps us busy with work, kids, house responsibilities, extra-curricular activities, and the Pandemic's stress. Or you are the single caregiver to a family member who is also highly stressed. Keep your life in check. Make sure if you are married that, your partner is helping out. All too often, women take on the role of Super Mom, except you can't fly. We think we must do everything because our partner is so busy that we feel sorry for him/her. The BIG problem is that your brain explodes if you do everything for everyone over an extended period. Not really. But for me, it felt like it… over and over again. Your husband or partner is still part of the family. He or she needs to feel needed. (My husband, Alan, complained after the kids left to live their own lives that he felt unneeded. Interesting, huh?) Like you, your partner can adjust his schedule to take the kids to a soccer match or a dentist appointment every once in a while.
Menopause had thrown me for a loop, and even though I tried various alternatives: birth control pills, natural hormones, and finally, antidepressants, they helped little. (Surprised my doctor didn't suggest that I needed counseling.) I still had this uncontrolled energy of fear running through me, sometimes feeling like I had stuck my finger in an electrical socket. Constantly I broke down in tears.
I had various visions; one vision was of his car being wrapped around a light post with Kyle's body lying on the ground. Or when he went to Henry's house, I'd have these horrible dreams about them drinking themselves to drunkenness or trying drugs.
Then once Kyle began driving, my fear of losing him intensified and sadly spread to thinking I would lose Nicole, so I became overprotective of her. When Nicole started 6th grade, I would drop her off at someone's house and then envision guys coming over to the house or the girls going to the mall, meeting up with some older boys, and going over to their place advantage. Or I envisioned that she had disappeared. When she asked to stay over at someone's house, I think she could feel my heart chiseling inside my chest, trying to break through. I was constantly on edge and ungrounded. When she had difficulty in 7th grade, I was worried that she felt unloved and that we weren't giving her enough attention because Kyle stole so much of our energy, so I tried to give her more, which probably made her feel claustrophobic. Sadly, she stopped asking me to go to anyone's house. But every once in a while, I could hear the sliding glass door slide open, but too tired to check. I'm sure she felt my fear whenever she asked if she could go somewhere, and finally, she gave up.
Menopause had thrown me for a loop, and even though I tried various alternatives: birth control pills, natural hormones, and finally, antidepressants, they helped little. (Surprised my doctor didn't suggest that I needed counseling.) I still had this uncontrolled energy of fear running through me, sometimes feeling like I had stuck my finger in an electrical socket. Constantly I broke down in tears.
I had various visions; one vision was of his car being wrapped around a light post with Kyle's body lying on the ground. Or when he went to Henry's house, I'd have these horrible dreams about them drinking themselves to drunkenness or trying drugs.
Then once Kyle began driving, my fear of losing him intensified and sadly spread to thinking I would lose Nicole, so I became overprotective of her. When Nicole started 6th grade, I would drop her off at someone's house and then envision guys coming over to the house or the girls going to the mall, meeting up with some older boys, and going over to their place advantage. Or I envisioned that she had disappeared. When she asked to stay over at someone's house, I think she could feel my heart chiseling inside my chest, trying to break through. I was constantly on edge and ungrounded. When she had difficulty in 7th grade, I was worried that she felt unloved and that we weren't giving her enough attention because Kyle stole so much of our energy, so I tried to give her more, which probably made her feel claustrophobic. Sadly, she stopped asking me to go to anyone's house. But every once in a while, I could hear the sliding glass door slide open, but too tired to check. I'm sure she felt my fear whenever she asked if she could go somewhere, and finally, she gave up.
As a teacher, I started having trouble remembering what I had taught the previous days. Luckily, I had made lesson plans so I could review the lesson. Unfortunately, remembering students' names was almost impossible, even though I had some of them for three years. I felt like my head was going to explode. And all too often, I spurt out immature comments without thinking ahead. A few times, when driving, I forgot what off-ramp I was supposed to exit, even though I have lived in the area for 14 years. I was positive I was either losing my mind or starting dementia or possibly both.
I cried a lot in Alan's arms. Then when I was about to commit myself to a sanitarium, not really, but I felt like that was my next step; someone told me about Emotional Freedom Therapy
- This therapy I did on my own, but if
it doesn't work, find a therapist.
eft.mercola.com (scroll down to
the bottom of the site, and you will find tons of different u-tube
demonstrations, from healing chronic pain to getting rid of sugar addiction. – (I
used this therapy to cut my karmic ties with my son after his 10th car
accident, and I had become a fearful, nervous wreck.)
EFT is a form of psychological acupressure
using the energy meridians acupuncturists use but without needles. Instead,
you tap with your fingertips on specific spots while thinking about your
issue (pain, trauma, drug use, etc. You then vocalize a positive statement, thus
clearing the blockage and restoring your body's balance, physically and
mentally. Before starting, you give your problem a number from 1-10, and then
after tapping the sequence, you again will give your situation a number. Usually,
you will find that a few EFT rounds are necessary to get the reaction scale
down to at least a 2.
https://www.emofree.com/eft-tutorial/tapping-basics/how-to-do-eft.html This site should answer many questions and have the whole process typed up.
https://www.emofree.com/eft-tutorial/tapping-basics/what-is-eft.html This site has a basic tutorial taught by the
founder, who explains the method very well. But if you want a therapist that practices this technique near you, look online.
I cried like crazy the first two times I practiced this technique. Thinking my fears were normal regarding my daughter, I didn't cut my cords with her until she had left home to live her own life. Naive of me.
Be aware of changes in yourself. Slow down. Take care of yourself. Get help. YOU ARE IMPORTANT TOO!
This sounds like me all the time. It's scary when you have people depending on you and feel like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders.
ReplyDeleteYes, it is scary when people are depending on you, but you aren't mentally there all the time. Look at my Blog# 12 and 7. The way I stay centered was by incorporating meditation back into my life or if I needed a really quick fix, I'd envision a tree, a stream or flowers. This simple technique really slowed me down so I could focus. Hopefully you'll find this useful.
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