Quite a few years ago, I watched a T.V. show where Vietnam veterans were interviewed about what helped them to survive during the war. Two vets who were interviewed shared some difficult times. One saw his friend die right in front of him, and the other said at times, he would become so depressed that he wished he was dead because he was so tired of seeing so much blood and atrocities that occurred there. Both men, at times, would fall into depression, sure he'd never make it home. But then one of the vets pulled this piece of paper out of his wallet and read it. His voice caught, and then he shared, "This list is what helped me stay alive during my lowest times." The second vet followed suit and read his list. Both men had had the same teacher but in different years.
Here's the assignment his class was given, which every human being as young as first grade should do: (The assignment might have to be broken down into steps and suggestions written on the board for the younger children.) Supplies needed: paper and a pencil or pen.
1. If the class has 35 students, the teacher assigns each person a number from one to seven. Then all the 'ones' meet in one area, the twos, etc.:
2. The teacher had each student write his/her name at the top of the paper and then have each student pass their paper to the right. That individual writes down two to three positive things about that student, and then the paper is handed to the right again to another student in that circle. (They do not write their name down of who made the comments.) NO REPEAT COMMENTS ARE ALLOWED, and NO NEGATIVE COMMENTS. After everyone writes their comments, new groups are formed, trying not to repeat any groups.
3. The teacher decides how many different groups to create, depending on the time. I usually wrote the numbers on the board, 1's and 3's meet in one group, and I would gesture where to move to, 2" and 7's, etc.: (I did this a few times. ) I reassigned groups, and they moved to new seats.
4. Once the students have moved to a few different groups, they return to their seats and read the comments that their fellow students had written. (It depends on how much time you have allotted for this assignment, but if the kids could move to five different groups, that would allow 15 comments.)
Some kids asked, 'Wonder if I don't like the person, what am I supposed to write?" I reminded them that everyone has a few good qualities, whether it's because they are athletic, musical, funny, friendly, have nice hair, etc.; (I taught high school, so I had to remind my students no sexual remarks.)
I smiled as I watched my students read what the other students had written. This exercise made them feel good about themselves.
I smiled as I watched my students read what the other students had written. This exercise made them feel good about themselves.
The kids really enjoyed this exercise, and the parents at Parent Conferencing shared that their teens read the list to their families. I bet this activity would also be perfect for the whole family. As a family, often times we are so busy that we forget to slow down and share our child's or spouse's strengths.
