69 - Yuck! The smell of Nicotene again? A spirit returns to say Hi to his dad

 
  “Happy Anniversary!” Alan said the minute he stepped foot into the kitchen.  Roses? I was surprised with the dozen deep red flowers that he held out to me. And then he grabbed me by the waist and pulled me in for a nice kiss. “I love you!” He said warmly.  I didn’t hear that very often anymore, so it took me by surprise. Too much pain has happened in this house that we sometimes forget that we love each other.
   We had celebrated our anniversary  Saturday, the 28^th, two days after our actual anniversary because we had forgotten that it was our special day. That week both of us were caught up in the turmoil of losing Kyle; he had died on our anniversary. We lied and told the mortuary, he died on the 24^th, but our bodies somehow still remember that painful day and we had grumbled at each other until I remembered why we weren't kind to one another.    

   After Alan trimmed the flowers and placed them in a vase, and I  dished out the dinner onto the plates, Alan asked me to sit next to him so we could go through the photos of our Danube trip from last year. I had taken way too many shots. I felt extremely close to him at that moment. There was so much love in the room. It was strange because this magical energy seemed to be exuding from us.  Then ….what the heck? Why was I smelling nicotine?  Oh, yuck, right while we’re eating, gross!  I tried fanning away the smell, but it didn’t get rid of it.  Then the scent became stronger, and it flew into my nostrils, burning the lining.  Finally, I held my nose. “Alan, do you smell that?”

   He looked up from the screen with furrowed eyebrows and looked at me strangely. 

   “No, really, it’s nicotine….what the hell.” I looked around which was stupid because there was no one else in the house except Roxy, our mutt. Had I thought she had taken up smoking? In the back of my mind, I was thinking, this happened about 7 years ago when I had some of Kyle’s friends over to celebrate his new birthday, the day he passed away.  But why now?  Kyle, is that you? Kyle’s head popped into my mind’s eye. What do you…?  And then I looked at Alan, and I knew. “Alan, I know you’re not going to like what I’m going to say, but your son wants to say Hi to you.” I could feel this tremendous love in the room as if God had wrapped his arms around the three of us. It felt so delicious.

   Alan looked up from the screen and turned to me with this blank stare but said nothing.

  “I wonder why he came in now,” I said confused. Alan returned to the computer and started again editing our pictures.  Was it because we were relaxed and not grumbling at each other? We were actually enjoying each other’s company just like the old days, laughing and teasing each other. 

   I think Kyle was trying to remind his dad that he’s still around. Has the pain for the loss of his son closed Alan’s spiritual doors?  I asked him a day later why he didn’t say Hi to his son, and he said he did. Well, then he must have said something to him in his head. I reminded Alan that we can still talk to Kyle even though he's on the other side, but that blank stare popped back up, so I dropped the subject.

    It’s sad that millions of people don’t comprehend that we don’t need to be sad or depressed because a friend or a loved one has left this world. They are ecstatic that they are in heaven. We need to honor that. Also, don't think we are keeping them earthbound when we speak to our dead friend or relative unless your pain is so great that one of them thinks they have to stay earthbound to help you through your grief. You have to let them go. But remember, they have their spiritual life too, you have your life with the living so don't talk to them every day. (Blog # 14 and 32 techniques to release)
   Their spirit stays on earth if they can’t forgive themselves, or if your pain is so intense that they try to help you through it. (Kyle did this for a few years, and yes it took me a few times to release him. It took us both a while to trust that we could still communicate with each other and finally he returned 100%   to his spiritual home,  heaven.
   After Kyle passed away and my students learned that we were communicating, they came up after class and asked me how they could get back in touch with their relative so they could talk to him/her again like they used to when they were little. I told them that they needed to meditate for a few minutes or just slow their breathing down and then welcome their friend or relative back and apologize for being gone for so long. They might have to do this for a few days and then be open to receive. But remember spiritual vibration are sooooo much slower than ours, so don't expect to start a conversation when you're late for work. Good luck!